So I work in a nursing home as a speech therapist, and a large part of my day is talking to adorable little old men and ladies who are either quite demented or just unabashed to be old and crazy. I jot down some of the funny comments and stories they tell me and want to share them with the world.

April 3

Ms. Latham: I have 5 children, I think. There were 7 brothers. I had 2 sisters.

Ms. Latham: Did I eat eggs? I don't drink so.

Ms. Latham: We went through a real serious war. I lost a brother to the war. That was terrific. I hate to think about it.

Ms. Latham: When you get as old as I am, you like to forget about them. [birthdays]

Ms. Latham: Yesterday I went to church. A baptist church but it was way out. We probably went by horse and buggy. Or a mule for sure.

Ms. Yates: [while getting her hair brushed] Now if I go to sleep, don't you wake me up.

Ms. Erwin: That's a lice name.

Ms. Erwin: It was ok. It was just yak yak. But that's what you have to eat around here.

Ms. Harris: [about her roommate] This woman she's the best thing ever. She doesn't hear me when I talk and I don't guess she pays for anything because she just comes and goes as she pleases.

Ms. Harris: I tell you, I know I've been bad. I don't listen to anybody. These people, they don't interest me. So I don't go out and look for friends or anything.

Mr. Bollen: I'm not getting none therapy. It's just a bunch of play. They call it group therapy but it's just a bunch of people getting together and having fun.